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It’s Katiepalooza Bitches!

06 Dec

That title made me smile. A lot. The other day I had a good Facebook rant about how lame it is that slapping a “palooza” on the end of a word such as pancakes or cookies constitutes witty advertising these days. This started a conversation wherein I got to bitch even more about the topic because as good friends do, everyone jumped in to encourage me. Then my friend Lillie made a one word comment that defused my bitchfest with its awesomeness…  “Katiepalooza.” It made me laugh really hard and has been giving me random chuckles for the last couple of days so I decided to get a few more miles out of it by using it in the title of this post just because I can. Yep. Welcome to Katiepalooza.

Anywhooo… I just wanted to provide a little follow-up on a couple of topics before I go to bed and sleep the sleep of a woman who just completed a very stressful week of finals. In my last post I told you all about that douche of a doctor who ridiculed me for being overweight; if you missed it you really should go back one post and read the story so you will have the right mindset for this. I will give you a few to do that… OK you back? Horrific right??!?! That guy is a serious douche!  Well the reason I am bringing it up again is because I told you I would give an update when I heard from OHSU about the complaint I filed.

I got a call today from a very sweet lady who just so happens to be the head of the department Dr. Douche Bag works in. She was extremely apologetic and thanked me for filing the complaint, which was very nice of her, but what came next was even better. She asked if I had a few minutes to talk and then proceeded to tell me that she had the exact same issue with this doctor!

It seems that she too is overweight and she had some concerns about her health and sleep due to her weight. Because she is the head of the department that oversees the sleep clinic she can check out a home testing machine, hook herself up to it in the comfort of her own bed, and then bring the machine in the next morning to have the results read.  It turns out that she does have sleep apnea and when she went to Dr. Douche Bag to talk about the results he ridiculed her for being obese and told her she was going to die in her sleep. He made quite a show of ensuring that she felt like a complete piece of crap (her words, not mine) but she didn’t have the benefit of having this discussion in the privacy of an exam room. Nope, Dr. Douche Bag said these things to her in a conference room in front of her subordinates (did I mention that this woman is his boss???).

She told me this story because she wanted to personally thank me for being brave enough to file the complaint that I did and for following through with all of the steps. It would seem that because they work together her complaint would have been handled in a very different way as it was technically a human resources issue. Because I am a patient and he treated me this way it is an entirely different ball of wax and since I was diligent enough to go through all of the proper channels and do what they asked of me, my complaint made it to the right people and there will be consequences.  The woman I spoke to, Liz is her name, told me that OHSU takes this kind of behavior very seriously and Dr. Douche Bag will be required to go through sensitivity training. Not only will he be required to go through this training, but he will also have to face the department chair about his actions and will face a performance evaluation after he finishes the sensitivity training, which involves being shadowed while doing consultations.

I feel totally vindicated and more importantly, I feel like the doctor will receive some much-needed instruction on proper bedside manner and hopefully will not make any more people feel as horrible as I was made to feel that day. Huzzah!

Oh! I have another update for you! Tuesday was my three-month no smoking anniversary! I was so wrapped up in finals that I forgot until today! YAY for three months of not smoking! I am happy to report that my smokers cough is completely gone now. I am starting to feel like I breathe a little easier but I am still huffing and puffing when I exert myself. The phlegm I was hacking up for the first month and a half – two months seems to have finally run out, and my husband says he can see a difference in my complexion. I still have my days, but I am very proud of myself and feel like even the shitty days when I can think of nothing but how much I would love to light up are totally worth it.

I want to speak about these cravings for a moment. After three months I don’t really think that I am feeling actual nicotine withdrawals… I am pretty sure I have the physical addiction beat. The problem is what I was getting out of smoking all along and I didn’t truly understand what that was until recently. I am an anxious person by nature and whether I choose to believe it about myself or not, I fear rejection. I fear rejection so much that I am in the habit of creating a barrier around myself for protection and smoking was a HUGE part of this barrier (what I like to call my bubble). Even smokers don’t REALLY want to be close to other smokers. Smokers stink. No matter how long you have been smoking you don’t want another person’s second hand smoke directly in your face. When smokers are huddled together smoking in whatever ridiculous public place they have been corralled into so they don’t offend the delicate nonsmokers they always have a healthy distance between them. For me, smoking kept people out of my bubble.

If I felt uncomfortable in a situation I could always excuse myself and go smoke. Nothing to talk about with a new person? Easy, go smoke. Conflict seeming to be unavoidable? Dude, have a smoke! Bar/gathering too crowded/loud/stuffy? Step outside for a smoke! Pissed off at your spouse? Go outside for a smoke on the porch! You get it? Smoking gave me something to put between myself and others and that my friends is what I have been craving! I am not craving a cigarette at all!  What I really want is a great big wall that I can put up between myself and anyone I don’t feel comfortable dealing with. The only question now is how in the fuck am I going to get that wall and how am I going to pack it around with me????

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4 Comments

Posted by on December 6, 2012 in So this happened today...

 

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4 responses to “It’s Katiepalooza Bitches!

  1. Sarah Brown

    December 6, 2012 at 9:00 am

    Good for you, justice is served!

     
    • Jennifer

      January 14, 2013 at 3:15 pm

      Right on! I have just discovered your blog. I am into a variety of art, weird to wonderful, etc. I jumped over here from Altered Bits, and I was swept ino your monologue. You are a fantastic storyteller! I am making major changes too, and it sucks.PERIOD. Being on a diet sucks, giving up drinking because it’s fattening, or smoking because its gives you a sense of protection, all of those things suck! But geting the results you are hoping for is so worth it (says the yoyo dieter) Anyway, in the course of reading several of your recent posts, I just have to tell you you are right on target, and yeah, you are attractive, who cares what you weigh (unless you do, which I understand completely) So, i’ll be back, and I’m glad you made your point loud and clear with that doc!

       
      • evilseamstress

        January 17, 2013 at 5:39 pm

        Thank you so much Jennifer! I have been slacking on checking and keeping up with my blog since the holidays but I will be back with more content soon! Thank you for your encouraging comments! I always appreciate them!

         

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dualdiagnosisparent

Riding the waves of dual-diagnosis as a parent.

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